Monday, May 13, 2019

REMEMBERING MOM ON THIS MOTHER'S DAY

My beautiful mother,
Rose Patricia,
who cooked for her family every nite except on Sundays
(broasted chicken nite while watching 60 minutes and The Wonderful World of Disney).
This year I'm kicking myself in the butt for not learning her crazy wonderful 
Italian recipes that her mother passed down to her.
I remember her asking "Debra Ann, do you want to watch me make raviolis?"
"Nope" was always my answer.
Always!
As I look back today I'm sure I was a bit of a disappointment to her for many reasons.
We were so very different in so many ways.
The list is pretty long,
I'll save that for a therapist one day.
HA!
But it really helps me with my own daughter as she is so very different than myself
which can sometimes be frustrating.  
For me though, 
she is no disappointment.  
We live in a different time,
and I'm incredibly proud of her. 
I admire and respect her strength of character, 
her strong work ethic,
 her passion to go after what she wants. 
 She has a fiery spirit 
and is so very smart and savvy. 
She is only 24 years old and already owns her own home!

My mother said I was stubborn,
I say my daughter is strong willed.
Same thing I believe.
LOL
Rose Patricia "Patti" in 1968
at her oldest sister's home making ravioli for Easter Sunday

But as much as I annoyed my mother
(and I know I did),
and as much as my daughter won't listen to my reasoning,
my mother was always there for me,
supporting me, loving me,
giving of herself no matter how mad I made her.
She taught me so much about love and giving.
And now I do the same for both of my adult children,
my son who has always been the easy one,
and my daughter who has always been my biggest challenge.
I was my mother's biggest challenge too.
Mom and Myself  1980,
the year I began teaching at Whitney High School

Patti never looked her age.  
She was 64 years old here.
A year older than I am now.
She would have been 103 today.
We were 40 years apart.
She tried for 8 years to get pregnant with me and had 2 miscarriages in the process.
I was her only child,
and I miss her dearly.
We talked everyday on the phone until she developed Alzheimer's at age 82.
She passed away 10 years later in a coma.
Not only had she forgotten us five years earlier,
but she had forgotten how to eat, swallow and finally breathe.
My daughter and I were with her the last night of her life playing her favorite music,
singing and dancing around her to her favorite songs 
by Tony Bennett,
Dean Martin, Andy Williams and Frank Sinatra.
We witnessed her last smile as she listened to her music.

I hope to one day be surrounded by my two babies and my grandchildren 
when I take my last breathe as well.
I'm hoping they will play for me all my favorites and sing and dance too.
Neil Young, Linda Ronstadt, The Eagles, Willie Nelson, Elton John, Joni Mitchell, Rod Stewart,
 Al Greene, Jackson Browne, James Taylor, Marvin Gaye,
and most importantly
 Tony Bennett, Dean Martin, Andy Williams, Frank Sinatra,
and of course The Rockits,
my sweet husband's band.
I guess we were similar in our taste in music after all.

I love you Mommy.
Happy Mother's Day!

2 comments:

  1. what a thought-full post ... and the pictures tell so much

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    1. Thank you Liz, it had me and my husband sobbing last night as I read it aloud to him. I sure wish I could have shared with her how right she was a bout so many things that I disagreed with her as a young woman. But isn't that always the way?

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